how to deal with loss..

I need another story...

Something to get off my chest..

my life is kind boring..

it is something that I can confess...
It was an opening of a song titled 'SECRETS'
by one republic..a truly touching song which I felt that it could express just what I needed right now...

I gotta admit..
I'm having a lot of difficulties to it this time..
A person who I truly cared for..
Where I spend time with him..
Where I spend some of my money on him..
Where I spend sleepless night just worrying about him..
Where I did have deep affection for him..(maybe more than friends)
Where I even gave up on certain principle that I practice just for him...

Later..
After showing his true colours to me...
Although I have made up my mind to be strong and
don't look back on him...
But deep down inside my heart...
I was truly hurt by his actions and felt betrayed for what he had done for me..
Even though I keep telling myself to let go..
Still...It is still hard to not just forgive him...
And also hard to forgive myself where I have deny the truth
And also hurt another person who is equal important in my life..

Thanks to facebook..
I came across an article from my Raja Yoga meditation 
who wrote a short..simple...yet powerful words that woke me up instantly..
That get me back on track...
Remind me on my true form..
Within seconds..
I've become who I really was..

This note that save my life..
When there is dependency, the loss of that upon which I was dependent causes sorrow. There is a sense of something missing when I am separated from the person, possession or position I have lost. To overcome this sense of loss, it is essential to understand that my body, relationships, wealth and the world are not constant – they are changing all the time. I may think that a person belongs to me alone, but the truth is that they are connected with many others. No one is truly ever mine. When relationships are based on true love and spirituality, that is, a soul to soul connection, there is no sorrow. Even when the time comes for a loved one to move on, what can help me deal with the loss is the awareness that what we have shared is with me even now and that our connection is an eternal one. It is vital to realise that even now my thoughts and feelings still reach them. Therefore, if I choose to have good wishes and pure feelings, as opposed to feelings of sorrow, this will help them on their
onward journey. It will be my gift to them.

..